Looking back at my summer break cum Nimmy’s therapy sessions in Budapest, I learnt a lot about life. The good, the bad and the ugly.
I realized that human beings were human beings everywhere; though our culture, race and colour may be different.
I realized that as human beings we are limited in our perspective to the extent of our knowledge and exposure. We are usually afraid of what we do not understand and look with contempt to things we perceive are inferior to us.
I realized that people are either good or bad, accommodating or grumpy; based on who they are and not the colour of their skin.
I remember once when we were coming down from the bus, Pemmy and Nimmy were sitting on their strollers and I carried pemmy and her stroller down from the bus then I turned back to help Peace carry Nimmy’s stroller down. A middle-aged woman came down from the bus and stood by the door of the bus waiting to help Peace carry down Nimmy’s stroller. She was not standing alone, she was standing with her two young sons. After she assisted Peace, I thanked her and she left with her kids. I looked at Peace and told her the woman was sowing good seeds into the lives of her children. As the children watched their mum help people in need, they were learning by example.
One thing that stood out for me in Budapest was something that was strange to me as It’s not something I see in my city (Lagos) often; old people (old people going places on their own. It’s not like we don’t have old people in Lagos but our transportation system or road network is not in their favour so they would always need assistance). They were everywhere in Budapest. Most of them pushing around their shopping bags. Some of them with their spouse (now that is my favorite) looking very cute together. Most of them were very friendly especially to my kids. They wanted to touch them, play with them and even ask questions if not for the language barrier. I remember one old lady looked at Nimmy in the bus and she started crying. Now it struck me, do we need to get close to our graves before we realise that life is not about proving who is superior or better but about loving and showing love. Life is about relationships. I guess the closer we get to our maker we are able to see clearly the things that are really important.
I also learnt by observing that when you think life has dealt you a blow for example by giving you a child with special needs, the more you dwell on your personal problems, the more depressed you become. The more you give of yourself and resources to help others in need the more you have no time for pity party.
I learnt that having a child with disability is not because God hates you or because you have sinned. I saw that the kids that were given opportunities by their families, schools and government live good lives even surpassing their parents’ expectations.
I learnt that as mothers of children with special needs, you also need a life of your own. You need to fulfil your dreams and be happy.
Will I go back to Budapest, yes, unless I get a better center in an English-speaking community.